I'm feeling emo now.
Was telling Christie about SKSH and SMKSH during lunch and then it hit me how much fun school in Malaysia actually was, only I was too stupid to actually know how much I would miss out on when I left.
I didn't even tell the others I was leaving until about a month before.
See how much of an idiot I was?
I missed out on so much stuff we could have done, but I just took it all for granted, took it ALL for granted and now look what's happened.
I haven't talked to Sonia for a month, I'm missing out on all the stuff that seemed so insignificant to me when I was still there. Like in form 2 when I missed out on Valentines day and Merentas Desa and even Hari Muhibbah and I thought that was ok because I'd have, what, another 3 years to be a part of that?
Wrong.
Now all I do is sit here, feeling sorry for myself and it's a selfish thing but I can't help feeling a bit jealous and left out when everyone has everyone else to rely on.
I'm just stuck in the middle of everything, all the people I trust are back in another country and I wouldn't even
think about telling anyone here my deepest darkest secrets because I know what they would do. Just about blab it to the world.
So you know, I'll just sit here and think about what I could have done and what I didn't do.
Not that anyone cares, right?
Nothing is real til' it's gone - Before it's Too Late/Goo Goo Dolls/
Transformers soundtrack.Labels: m; emo